This isn't the breakfast of champions. This is the breakfast of goddamn geniuses. Get the recipe.

We're talking cream-braised potato, mozzarella, cheddar, AND crème fraîche up on this baby. Oh, and bacon. Get the recipe here.

It was meant to be. Get the recipe.

This glorious creature is made of pizza dough buns stuffed with ancho chile-spiked mashed potatoes, peppers, and manchego cheese. Get the recipe.

STACK 'EM UP. Get the recipe.

It's not mandatory to bake the bread yourself, but the carbohydrate gods will smile upon you if you do. Get the recipe.

#Disrupt Thanksgiving. Get the recipe.

International Carb Players Anthem: A chickpea-flour crepe with a spicy potato-and-veggie filling. Get the recipe.

Too long have cereal and pancakes been kept from each other by the small-minded division of breakfast into temperature-based categories. People, rise up! We CAN have it all! Get the recipe.

When in doubt about what to eat for dinner, just form tater tots into some sort of blob with your hands. Get the recipe.

Shhh, don't try to understand. Just let it be. Shhhhh. Get the recipe.

IDK, just roll with it. Get the recipe.

Want to feel classy AND get your carb on? This sophisticated number is for you. Get the recipe.

Step 1: Make an oatmeal cookie crust. Step 2: Fill it with butter, brown sugar*, eggs, cream, and more good things. Step 3: Descend into blissful carb coma for the next six months. Get the recipe.

*You may point out that this pie is not technically carb-on-carb in the sense of starchy carbs, but lest ye forget: Sugar is a perfectly respectable carb in its own right. The carb to rule all carbs!

Bacon bits are so overdone. Get the recipe.

It's like the sandwich has little spaghetti arms, reaching out to you. Calling to you. Get the recipe.

Sure, you could eat normal lasagna, but you could also take lasagna noodles and wrap them around mashed potatoes, cheddar, and bacon. Your choice. Get the recipe.

Forget pizza pies. THIS is amore. Get the recipe.

Exactly as powerful as you think it will be. Instructions here.

My friend, do you know what a California burrito is? Well, long story short, it's a burrito with french fries on the inside. And this one has some scrambled eggs, too, for good measure. Get the recipe.

Indian cuisine is truly a promised land of potato-on-dough delights. Get the recipe.

You look at this pizza and ask, "Why?" but I look at this pizza and ask, "Is it cool if I eat the whole thing?" Hot tips for how to make it here.

These babies are loaded up with oats, pretzels, potato chips, Snickers and a whole lore more. Get the recipe.

Some things are just better together. Get the recipe.

If it looks like apple pie and smells like apple pie and acts like apple pie, it must be secretly made out of Ritz crackers. WITCHERY. Get the recipe.

Just because this sweet potato is vegan doesn't mean it doesn't know how to have a good time. Get the recipe.

Are you getting tired of looking at this pizza? Well, I don't care. I will never, ever, ever, EVER stop telling you about this pizza. Get the recipe.